Assignment #1

Ok, so I’ve been given this assignment from my sister (Sadie) to write about what the world would be like if we were all blind! Gee……talk about funneling down the topic for the sake of paragraph development – NOT so much in this case. Indeed, this seemed like a ridiculously broad topic to me; nevertheless, I started putting some thought into it and decided to give it a shot.

Sadie pointed out some good things regarding the economy and how it would be different. For instance, we wouldn’t be able to see how to drive, so we wouldn’t need automobiles, and we wouldn’t need the gasoline for them; hence, no need for oil wars!! So, there you go. Voila! World peace problem solved.

A multitude of industries would definitely be affected though, such as, cosmetics (nobody would care how we looked without makeup), clothing and fashion (all we’d need would be a blanket or perhaps a comfy loin cloth of some sort for the weather, comfort, and protection), home décor (we wouldn’t need to decorate our homes….just the basic furniture to sit on, lie on, and eat on), sports equipment and the sports business in general (we wouldn’t be able to see how to catch, throw, putt, kick, hit, or punch; we couldn’t watch sports either -- live or TV), so you get the point. The economy would be completely different based upon our needs.

However, knowing the human being like I do, I’m sure we’d make up for all of those unneeded industries with others. For example, we would be so much more dependent upon our other senses; particularly hearing. Therefore, the technology of sound would be a booming industry and of course we would be forced to just listen to everyone instead of LOOK and listen. So, radio and sound recordings would continue to be a huge necessity. Luckily the music industry would flourish but, unfortunately the other arts would suffer. We already know that blind people can really kick ass on a musical instrument so, no problems there. But, no need for the wonderful painters or even color for that matter! So, as this topic is getting way too broad and entirely out of hand, I will let your imagination and intrigue do the rest and come up with all the zillion other stuff I could write about but won’t!

As far as our relationships with people, a much needed change could possibly occur. We wouldn’t be so judgmental on how one looks but, we would certainly be into how they feel and smell!! We would be more conscious of how we speak and be mindful of the tone and inflections of our voices. But, perhaps by not being able to see the person we would be more intuitive with each other. We’d be more sensitive because we would “sense” others’ feelings and thoughts. Actually, we should really do that anyway but, we don’t always choose to do so. Thus, we would definitely be more dependent upon each other, I feel. I think it would be terrible to be blind and alone anyway. I’m sure that blind people today already feel alone at times even if in a large group of people -- but, physically being alone would make it even worse.

In the end, I think blindness would bring about more fear. Not really knowing what’s going on….even when you’re awake! Not seeing what people are doing, not seeing their expressions, and feeling that you’re not receiving the absolute truth. So, not only is our fear enhanced but, our trust is disabled as well.

I’m guessing that God really knew what he was doing when he gave us FIVE senses (well, actually SIX if you count intuition). He knew that we would not be whole (as a society) without the gift of sight. He knew the right combinations, ingredients, components, design, features, etc. in order to create a functional human being. I, for one am glad that he figured that one out -- Because, I really like having eyes. Sight brings me a plethora of happiness. Like when I see my son smile at me or his expression as he reads a book – I just completely melt with emotion. When I see the sunrise in the morning, I feel hope and gratitude for a continuation of life, love, and all that could possibly happen that day. When I see my mother’s face as I visit her and feel comfort, knowing that I still have her on this earth with me – seeing that same face that looked at me as a child and made me feel that I was always safe and loved. To be able to see the beautiful little house that I grew up in, as I enter the driveway. Just knowing it’s still there, looking basically the same, always makes me feel like….me again.

So, dear sister -- as I ponder your question with much thought and contemplation, let me just say that in my well-educated opinion...... I think the world would be damn scary if we were all blind! How's that for a scholarly statement? Seriously, we would probably still be thinking that we were all standing on a vast, flat surface with a lot more obstacles than just some occasional big rock that we bump into, or a wild animal that we need to run from. Our obstacles would also include fear, doubt, distrust, apprehension, and anxiety! Yeah, we all experience these emotions already but, come on……why double the dosage? So, since I obviously cannot think of a clever and significant ending for this never ending topic …..I’ll just finally end with a verse of a song that’s been going on in my head ever since I started this continuous rant:

I can see clearly now the rain is gone.
I can see all obstacles in my way.
Gone are the dark clouds that had me down.
It’s gonna be a bright, bright sun shiny day!

Renewal

I’ve learned a lot about people over the years but, it seems that during the past five years, I’ve had an overdose of conflict and clashing. By clashing I mean, personalities that you just don’t jive with, mesh with, or even comprehend. The main thing that I’ve realized is that some people never grow up! They create the same environment and situations that you found yourself a part of in middle and high school! They are locked in their cages of jealousy, malevolence, and resentment. They are so consumed with their own feelings that they want others to join them in experiencing the same hostility. So, they speak, and talk, and converse, and chatter…..until they feel they’ve proven their point and have gained a few converts and loyal believers. The stories start to grow, the exaggerations begin to expand, and the fabrications appear to be real and solid truth.

I’ve encountered these personalities in the workplace and the culprits have all been my age or older! I just don’t get it. I was always taught to respect my elders and by God, I have! However, these latest episodes have proven to be disheartening to me. Why is it that some people feel the need to hurt (emotionally) another human being? Why do they feel the need to diminish others’ self-esteem and strip them of faith? Are they so poisoned by jealousy and bitterness that they are willing to use the spoken word as a weapon? Why is that some people, particularly women, feed on juvenile tactics and pot-stirring?

I truly believe that we are all connected energetically by a spiritual power and force of the universe and by God. I want to believe that all human beings are innately good and in want of the betterment of mankind. I want to believe that when a person hurts another, they feel remorseful because they realize they have unjustly and mistakenly created negative energy.

I’m realizing that my previous incidents of pain and distrust have caused me to somewhat hide and hibernate. I feel that I’m currently unemployed because I am so scarred and marred that I am afraid to go back out into the battlefield of society. I guess I’m just not ready …….. and just maybe, God knows that. Perhaps he is nursing me back to spiritual health and allowing me to lick my emotional wounds. If that is the case, then I know what my next goal in this life is. I know what I must conquer and surmount: My tolerance and understanding of our diverse mankind, a stronger backbone and thicker skin to uphold my dignity, and most importantly………to renew my trust in the human spirit.

I'm OK, You're OK, We're OK!

A couple of things have happened recently that have caused me to reminisce and reflect on my youth.....namely my school years. First of all, I taught a music camp at the Spencer-Penn Centre a couple of weeks ago. This place used to be an elementary school, in which I attended and is now renovated to house community events. As I walked through the very familiar halls and opened the doors to some of the classrooms, I was visually hit with instant memories. Flashes of scenes entered my mind as I nostalgically wandered the building. The smell was even familiar. But, what really intrigued me were the "feelings" that crept inside of me. Deep and familiar feelings of .........well.... discomfort, uneasiness, ....... even fear. I would drive back home each day of music camp, thinking of so many past occurrences and people. I guess "riding down memory lane" as they say. But, I just couldn't shake these odd feelings I had.

After days of this, I realized that probably everyone goes through a "not-so-happy" element of being a child in a school setting. You're expected to dwell in a very large room with other children, (who have their own set of problems and differences) and adults with loud and sometimes harsh demands. You're expected to toss aside your personal beliefs and desires for the day and conform to a multitude of rules, exercises, and duties. You're 5 or 6 years old and you have no idea what the heck is going on or why you're there in the first place. All of your conditioned responses are kicked into high gear and so you cry, worry, wonder, feel frustrated, and .....yes, feel "fear."

Oh, we get the hang of it after awhile -- some of us, more quickly than others. We adapt, we conform, and we learn the drill. We learn when to laugh and when to smile. We learn to raise our hands and hold our pee. We learn to eat what is placed before us and when it's given to us. We learn how to be quiet for long periods of time. We begin to understand that for a specified number of hours during the day, we are ......"somebody else. " We are someone totally different than who we are at home. We are the person that was created in that large room.

(Talk about going off on a tangent! Didn't intend to go there!! )

The other thing that has made me think about my school life is reconnecting with friends on Facebook. It's amazing how people seem to change over the years (not just physically) but, their ways of thinking and their daily concerns and life goals. We're aware (sometimes) that we ourselves change but, never really think about how others do. So, do we just call all of that change "growing up?" I think so.

Something that people probably never realized in school was that I was extremely....... SHY!! Yes, I was! I was insecure, timid, and always afraid. (Remember those feelings that I talked about earlier??) They mostly disappear over time but, we are constantly reminded of them throughout our lives. Basically, during our school years we're obsessed with being "accepted." We constantly strive for others' approval. Which is absolutely ludicrous because they are feeling the same things we are! Ok, another tangent.....but, we carry so much baggage from our school days with us throughout our lives. We fear that people will always remember us or see us in negative ways. But, weren't we all just experiencing life? Learning and growing? Experimenting? Going through trial and error periods? That's life. We all have to do it. The problem is that when you're "doing" all of those things, you get ridiculed and judged. Because that's how young people handle things --- Because you have gone astray from the "big classroom rules and expectations." You can't be an individual for heaven's sake.......you have to be a group! And the "group" doesn't recognize or accept differences, or ideas, or .......... growth. (I know, that's tangent #3)
I always felt different from my friends in school for one reason or another. But, I accept who I was then and know that those experiences are partly responsible for who I am today. Sometimes, my experiences were fun and brought a lot of joy......and many times they brought tears and very painful feelings of despair and frustration. But, in the end they culminated into a contented state of mind and being.......an individual who benefitted from experience. Who tasted life in sometimes unusual ways. Nevertheless, I felt what I felt .....I did what I did.....and I am who I am.

So, if you ever find yourself wandering through the halls and classrooms of one of your old schools, and you're bombarded with unidentified feelings ......... just think about my little tangents above and know that you're normal.....you're not crazy......you're not scarred from past events.......you're just.....YOU! and that's ok!